FAMILY-2006

I was sitting quietly in my room when i suddenly heard a thud on door.Someone was surely practising some Bruce Lee style combat moves on my door.Taking a crictical look at the situation i instantaneously realised that i am better off in letting the savage fellow inside my room or else the door will be shattered.As soon as i opened the door i saw three of my closest and dearest dorm mates standing outside.The Career Launcher class in which all four of us have enrolled was finished about two hours ago and though we had to take a lot of whipping from the teachers we still were in jubiliant mood as India yet again thwarted Pakistan by 5 wickets.They quickly entered in my room when suddenly one of them ordered me to play a new movie.The other two nodded in his favour.Its a custom in our hostel then when we have visitors then we treat them as the masters of the room.Although it may sound a bit odd but isnt it the same guidelines of "Attithi Devo Bhava" which have been engraved on our mindfields since we were children."So which movie should I play?" i asked them.Obviously there was a small debate over this issue as we all have diffrent choices and every person has the right to express it but sooner then later it was clear that it has to be some new hindi flick.I guess that was all that was the needed.With a few clicks of my mouse i start surfing through the movie server which my lovely alma mater has provided for all its students.In the recently downloaded section i find a movie named Family with the starcast as Amitabh Bachaan.I guess that was all that was required for me and i quickly copied and started playing the movie.
Now here comes the good part or should i say the part which really made me think.All of us were watching the movie with a sense of emotion which is quite understandable as all of us have been away from home for atleast three years if not more.The short breaks are too small and as far as I m concerned I don't spend more then 20 days in a year at home.The movie ended and two of my friends made thier way to the computer centre whilst one walked lazily to his room.So i was left alone in my room with nothing much to do and just to think about my surroundings and the situations and people who affect me directly or indirectly.I cudnt even start & think about my day for a profound thought was consuming me.They say media affects you a lot and in this case it was to be true.Trying to uncover all the views and various subjects potrayed in the movie and keepin myself in a neutral position I started to place myself in thier places and asked myself if I would have acted in the same manner.After much of thinking and reciprocating i could see some words printed on the newsprint of my mind.The past memories were taking over the present and i found myself in a state of "Mea Culpa".Mea Culpa on the part that how much i had ignored by family at times.Mea Culpa because of not returning them with love when i was showered with it.Mea Culpa for shying from my responsibities at time.
There were so many other instances that it all looked like a spectre trying to consume my soul everytime i try to go deeper into the cave of my mind.Guilt was the most prominent state i was in for a few minutes but then i pacified myself in order to find the reasons and get into the details of the things which led me away from my family.Was it just selfishness on my part or were my priorities changing?Was i acting abnormal or is it the same with most people of my age?With mind full of questions i set out from my room to take a few rounds of the garden still searching for the answers which seem distant.What i found was that most of people did play there part in the families but at moments priorities did change.Ignorance did rule for a while.Be it spending time with your girlfriend when its time for you to go back home and meet the parents who are so eagerly waiting for you or be it the assignments and projects that you have undertaken when you should be with your parents.All of my colleagues at some point or the other had the same sense in that.We humans really are filled with qualities which are oxymornons to each other.At one time we can be as cold as stone and yet we can melt like wax in a matter of minutes.Emotions rule high and ever more so since the hectic life which we are leading nowadays.
Probably i did what was the best for me and my family back then but now i regard myself as thier culprit.Maybe they dont see a criminal in me but for me a sense of guilt has developed.Maybe this will blow over after sometime but one thing that has changed is that I will definately think about my family a lot more then I usually did.Hope all of you who read this piece also learn something for I know that we miss our families a lot but do very little about it.